just to start off totally off topic, remember yesterday i said i got some fluff and i showed the wrap and soaker? well that soaker came with two dresses and here she is trying on one of them. happy, chunky, sweetest baby shot of the day:
take a moment to imagine how cute her butt looks sticking out of that dress with the matching soaker on, ok? if that doesn’t make your ovaries twitch you are definitely done making babies.
now onto the scheduled topic:
i have the most vivid dream life, as far back as i can remember i have. my dreams are not different then my reality except that i wake up. i mean, i was talking to my friend jham about dreams once and he was saying something about how he only heard or only saw or something (sorry jham for not remembering) and i was shocked. you mean, not everyone dreams just like being awake? i thought other people might either dream less or more then me. i know some people simply do not remember. but, i didn’t realize there were different ways to experience dreaming.
the difference between my dreams and my reality is so slight that i often have a hard time in the morning reintegrating into the reality where the stuff that happened in the dream didn’t really happen. for example, i might have a dream in which flash and i have a fight. then in the morning i come downstairs and there he is and i am still kind of trying to process all that stuff he said in the fight except we didn’t really have a fight. it can be confusing.
just today it occurred to me that i should be asking the spirits for more help understanding my dream life. why i have the dreams i have, why my dreams are so real, what i can do to help make them easier to live with, and so on. i think this is a good plan but i am not doing it right now. sorry, just not.
recently whenever i type the word “good” i accidentally type the word “god.” what is that about? sometimes it happens over and over. i type “god” then i back space to retype and again “god” and then again and “god.” is my “o” key breaking or is someone trying to tell me something?
a piece of our fencing blew down a few weeks ago. we just moved into this house less then a year ago and one plus what the already fenced in backyard. good for kids and for dogs. we don’t have dogs but i want dogs and i think, in theory, flash would like a dog also. now we are missing a piece of fence so we have to get that repaired but after that i am secretly thinking i might be ready for the dog. am i off my rocker? with everything else going on i want a dog? a dog? well, i want a rescued greyhound to be exact. i have had two while living with my parents. one in highschool and one in/after college. they are the most amazing creatures. i was thinking i might want to adopt on into our family now. then the other day i was driving home and passing this big field and there were two rescued greyhounds (once you have had one you can spot them a mile off). their person had just let them off leash and they took off at a sprint. when a greyhound sprints it is like nothing else i have ever seen. i mean, when they are running free and just because they can. not like when you see the clips of them tearing around the race track with numbers and muzzles. these two ran like ours did when we had them and it took my breath away just like it always has. you have to see it to know what i am saying but once you have seen it you are hooked. it is like life. life. pure, simple, unabashed, free, present, light, life. god.
remember a few posts ago i said i wanted to be a happy family snuggling in bed and eating donuts (or something to that affect)? well, this morning flash took the kidlets so i could sleep in. and then when it was a good time for me to wake up, he brought the kids up and they all got in bed. he told me he had read my blog and saw i wanted that so he did it.
i wish i could put into words the kind of hope that simple gesture gave me. i wish i could have turned to him and said the perfect things so that he knew how much it meant to me. i guess the best i can do is tell him to come read the blog again. there i was, having a rather unpleasant and very real dream and suddenly i was woken by the sound of the bean’s voice. and next thing i know, instead of unpleasant dream, i am in a very pleasant reality. full of elbows and feet and screeching chickpea’s and hugs and silliness. it was fantastic.
ok, so if you read today please do me a favor and tell me a little bit about your dream life. do you dream? do you remember your dreams? do you dream in color? in sound? with pictures? just like reality?
and i promise that i will talk to the guides about mine soon and i’ll keep you posted. because come on, there must be a reason i am plagued like this…