for as far back as i can remember i have thought of myself as LAZY.
as someone who would rather try to find ways to do nothing then find happiness hard at work.
i have even sought out ways to make the lazy me happy – sometimes sitting down to fold laundry and watch tv when both the kids were at preschool this fall.
but recently i have realized something.
i am actually happier when i am hard at work.
i feel better when i stay active and get projects done.
i enjoy doing.
holy swear word.
my entire world has flipped over and turned around.
instead of seeking out ways to do nothing without getting caught i can just do what needs to be done AND actually be a happier person at the same time.
can you even imagine this?
every night i pull out my journal and jot down a few notes about the day. recently i have been just scrawling out over and over, i am not lazy. that is not my truth. i like doing things.
and i have been dreaming, dreaming big, about what other lies i am holding onto about myself.
and, in my nighttime reading, i have been underlining this word a lot:
something is brewing here. it feels big and it also feel so flowing. just paddling right on down stream.
(ok now mom, i know you are reading this and thinking about the pile of dirty tupperware you walked in and found on the kitchen counter that i left until later so that i could get a blog post up today and you are probably also thinking, “right. uh huh. that robin is just always actively doing things. we just can’t stop her!” so i’ll just clarify for anyone who needs it that i am still not the mountain moving kind of person that perhaps some other members of my family are — hello mom and also sister-in-law-you-know-who-are-major-do’er — but i am ready to let go of lazy. it just doesn’t feel like a good fit anymore.)
i am examining my untruths. it is a good time for it. want to join me?
* and speaking of joining me just in case you haven’t heard about amber’s awesome new ecourse crafting my life head on over and check it out. i am lucky enough to be helping her out in a few itty bitty ways with what promises to be a really wonderful ecourse self adventure. so, sign up and join me!