the other day i was looking at the tag line here on my blog and wondering if i ought to remove the “sometimes food.” truthfully, i haven’t been writing much about food in the last months. i definitely have realized i do not have the makings to be a food blogger. i love food. i dream about food and cook food and focus on food throughout my day but i am not a food blogger. all the pictures and exact measurements elude me.
while i was in south carolina i put some weight back on. i think it was the weight i had lost frequenting the gym and it just happily piled back on. comfy cozy. when i returned and was talking about it with flash i mentioned my feeling that having two kids this young makes it hard for me to be consistent about working out. working out is what it would take for me to lose the weight at this point. i don’t want to always be upset with the extra pounds i am wearing. it feels bad to feel bad.
i would rather just feel good.
with that in mind i put some thought into how i could feel good. i wanted some clarity on what it made sense for me to be striving for. i have written some about my more recent efforts to connect more fully with physical body. i know this is a work in progress for me and i know that a part of it is finding ways to dedicate myself to using my body more and to moving joyfully more often.
suddenly though, i thought again about the connection between what i put in my body and how i feel about my body. i have been in and out of this many times in my life, and each time i cycle through it i end up sustaining a healthier version of eating. i feel myself cycling back in again though. somehow, as the winter months set in i thought less about what i was eating and how it was making me feel. i started thinking about food as what was making me fat instead of as what was nourishing me and creating the energy for my physical body to use.
it is a subtle and simple shift back to eating for better energy. i start the day with a green smoothie (or two). i focus on eating foods i have prepared myself with whole ingredients. i bake our bread. i have some simple salads ready and waiting in the fridge to be a base for an easy lunch. i thaw single portions of veggie soups i made this fall for another simple lunch option. i only eat meat from our local meat csa share. i snack on nuts, cheese and olives. i cook a meal that i think my husband will enjoy for dinner.
i am not denying myself anything. i am still drinking my coffee. i had a bite of chocolate after lunch today. i am not trying to lose weight here. i am trying to feel good. i am recognizing that the way my body feels has a dramatic affect on my spirit. i am recognizing that there is not such a huge chasm between the woowoo warrior work and my love of food.
so, i will keep baking. i will keep cooking. i will keep going to whole foods as a special birthday treat. i will keep my tagline as it is.
lunch – cabbage soup from the freezer (topped w olive oil parmesan cheese)
dinner – sweet potatoes with garlic and cumin, country style pork shoulder ribs with a sauce i made up , salad
lunch – chef salad
dinner – beef brisket (in the slow cooker with lime, cilantro, cumin, chili pepper, salsa), brown rice with black beans and corn, all topped with avocado and cilantro
lunch: salad topped with brisket and rice leftovers
dinner: take out for my bday!
lunch: same salad as wednesday!
dinner: two steamed artichokes with lemon butter (i was home alone it was a bday treat)
lunch: salad w lots of nuts and seeds and avocado/garlic/lemon dressing
dinner: left overs and spinach salad.
everyday breakfast is green smoothie and either a bowl of kashi cereal or a few slices of homemade bread. this week the bread is a “five grain” i adapted from the healthy bread in 5 mins a day book. it is super dense but lovely toasted with some butter. i also have coffee each morning.