have you been to that place? through your silent meditation, or a led meditation, a yoga class or a long walk in the woods or your fingers in the garden for hours, or through prayer, or with the help of your god or goddess or some guides — have you been to that place where all the inner voices recede for a moment and you feel instead the calm, vibrant, still, explosion of inner quiet? have you known this sacred moment? maybe, if you are a parent you felt it in that instant that you first met your child in this life and this body and you looked into their eyes? maybe it was years ago while your favorite cat sat in your lap purring as you looked out the window long enough to let everything blur? maybe it was sitting beside the ocean listening to the rhythm of the waves and feeling your pulse and breath match mother nature’s tempo?
have you been to this place? this is the place where we can feel we are connected. we feel the truth of the string of light that tells us that god, the divine, the universe, the great light, is in all of us. we are all one. it is the place where we have a felt understanding that we truly are not our thinking self. the thoughts can move aside and leave a clear nothingness full of life energy.
i will tell you a secret you may already know. we can all get to this place. once you have been there one time you can go back any moment you want to or need to. you can set your intention to go and suddenly arrive. you can be. it is true. it is so true i will promise you.
if you don’t think you have been there then let me know and i will see if we can work together on what the right path is for you. if you have been there but you are not sure that you can get back on your own and you think i could help then do the same. tell me you might like some help. if i am not the person to help you then talk to your yoga teacher, your minister, your buddhist friend, that cool woman who does energy work in the center of town, your dog. teachers surround us willing to help and share.
if you know what i am talking about, if you know that moment of quiet and noiseless noise then try out playing a game. the game is called, “i believe woowoo mama.” i am telling you that you can get back there in an instant if you set your intention. try a deep breath. try a leap of faith. will yourself there. play it as a game not worrying if the first four thousand and fifty three times you jump and land without that momentary pause. try it as a game and see what you find. i believe that you will find you can ground, center, and open to your own inner quiet. that you can do it instantly.
this is the place i retreat to when i need to find the juice to keep going. this jump to my spot of connection is my first move when i am making good decisions about how to handle one of those moments. you know, one of those moments? the bean is on the couch crying for me to turn the television back on and chickpea is banging on the metal back door and screaming “outside outside outside!” it is dark and raining and only 4:30 and only november with the whole long winter ahead and too early to pour a glass of wine and i don’t want to be drinking my way through parenting anyway and how did it get to this moment where i just want to scream at everyone under the age of thirty to shutupshutupshutup?!
breathe. breathe. breathe.
sit down (this helps me for some reason), close eyes, let go, jump in, open up, connect, inner quiet.
stay with it. stay with it. stay with it. ah, warmth spreading.
hello sneaky thoughts. i don’t need you right now. i need one more nanosecond of:
opening, light, expansiveness, fireworks, silence.
the world has not changed after this. the children may still be screaming and i may still be frazzled but i am there. i am there and i am trying my best and i am doing what i can. i am woowoo parenting.
and we live happily ever after.