sometimes i want to stop all this nonsense and just be normal.
i don’t want to be the one who is believes in animal telepathy.
i don’t want to try to explain what a shamanic practitioner is.
i want to feel more sameness and less outsideness.
i want to abandon the alternative ship and walk ashore where the masses seem to be enjoying beach volleyball and bonfires with lovely cocktails and the kind of conversation that just flows along with a lot of nodding heads and understanding.
i want to drive past the elementary school and just know for sure that the bean is starting kindergarten there next fall instead of thinking, “hmmm, hmmmm, hmmmmm, will we homeschool?”
in the dusty hole torn slippers of my cognition it seems like it could be easier or simpler or lighter.
but then i remember.
i have tried that path.
it doesn’t fit and i feel empty dark and alone.
actually, it is much easier just being me.